My father has never seen therapy as potentially helpful, until he found out that I had told my mother that I believed I was recovering memories of my father subjecting me to sexual abuse as a child.
The text below contains several phrases in [brackets]; indicating that the words in brackets were added for clarification after the letter was sent to the I.D.F.P.R.
My father, Richard Kopsick, reached
out to Dr. Feld about me in mid-March 2015, on the advice of Dr. Sol Rappaport.
My father told Dr. Rappaport that I
had "symptoms" of something and was "catatonic". Around
this time, my father would shout at me, and I didn’t know whether shouting
back, being silent, or speaking softly would make him yell at me less.
I did not have catatonia. Catatonia
involves both irregular speech and irregular movement. Sitting still on my
father’s couch is not irregular movement. The way I was talking was not
irregular; my father just couldn’t relate to what I was saying.
My father described me as catatonic,
to distract from the fact that he had recently discovered that I had been
talking and publishing posts about him and molestation. He knew on February 24th,
2015 – a month before he went to Dr. Rappaport – that I had begun to suspect
that he molested me when I was a child.
My father has routinely screamed at
me, picked fights with me, intimidated me, and manipulated me with gifts, for
the last 20 years. He has been doing this because he wants to subject me to
constant abuse, to make me forget that he molested me when I was age 8 and 9.
I recovered these memories by myself
- without the help of a therapist, meaning there’s no chance
of therapist-implanted memories - between 2015 and now.
In 1995 and 1996, my father tickled me
violently on the gray couch in our basement in Lake Bluff, and "tickled
me" on my penis, over my clothes, and squeezed my testicles to make me
stop screaming. He knew I was trying to escape and pretended he would let me go
if I pulled my way out.
He also partially suffocated me at
the time via restraint, making it difficult to remember the abuse (oxygen
deprivation). I forgot the abuse some time between the ages of 10-13.
Despite 1) my father's willingness
to speak on my behalf in sessions with Dr. Feld, 2) my father's flat-out denial
of what I said even when it wasn't accusative about him; 3) my father's
domineering way of treating me, and 4) my hesitancy about talking with Dr. Feld
due to the fact that my father was paying for the sessions (meaning Feld would
be unlikely to be objective if I were to say I remembered him abusing me),
Dr. Feld was unable to detect that
my father was trying to silence me about something. If I had felt comfortable
around Dr. Feld, I would have disclosed that I suspected that I had been
molested and was trying to recover memories.
Instead of welcoming my criticism of
my father, Dr. Feld prescribed me Abilify. My father recruited Dr. Rappaport,
Dr. Feld, my uncle, and my mother to pressure me into taking Abilify. I never
took it because I have never been diagnosed with anything.
I probably have C.P.T.S.D. from my
father's abuse, but Feld never discussed that possibility, nor discussed any
disorder with me other than O.D.D. (Oppositional Defiant Disorder), which he
told me I didn't have.
I found out years later that
Abilify's makers have been sued for pushing the medication, which has side
effects that include reduced inhibitions, and in rare cases, partial paralysis.
Abilify is also diagnosed to cure some of the same problems it causes as side
effects; namely, dissociation, mania/restlessness, and depression.
The fact that Abilify can cause
partial paralysis, or impairment of the ability to stand up and think clearly
and speak clearly, have caused me to suspect that if I had taken Abilify, I
might have been rendered unable to remember and/or talk about the memories of
abuse that I was trying to recover.
After my five sessions with Dr. Feld, I found out
that my mother's sister specifically warned my father not to have me see Dr.
Feld, because he had been accused of having an affair with a past client.
This is not the kind of psychiatrist
that I wanted to open up to, because I was worried that I had been molested as
a child and had recently begun experiencing flashbacks to my childhood.
After
the third or fourth of my five visits with Dr. Feld - each of which cost my
father $200 - I began to express interest in psychology, since I had discussed
the topic with a friend of mine from Wisconsin who has schizophrenia and was
molested as a child.
After I expressed interest in
continuing therapy - between the fourth and fifth sessions - my father
expressed interest in canceling the fifth session, which had already been
scheduled. That fifth session took place in late April or early May 2015.
My father decided to let me
go to the fifth session, but he decided that that would be the last one. Some
time, at least several weeks after that fifth session, my father began
remembering what happened in a different way, when I would talk to him about
it. He has claimed, since mid-2015, that I was the one who
decided to stop going to see Dr. Feld. That is not what happened.
As I stated, I wanted to go
to the fifth session, and my father did not want me to. The fifth session had
been booked, he wanted to cancel it, and I persuaded him not to cancel it. He
decided to let me go to the fifth session, that was the last time I saw Dr.
Feld, and I was fine with that being our last session.
My father has lied about how
and why I stopped seeing Feld at least twice.
I say this, however, only as
background, to explain what else I want the I.D.F.P.R. to know. During either
my fourth or fifth therapy session with Feld, I told him that my father wanted
to cease paying for my visits to him.
Feld pushed back against
this, attempting to persuade me to continue scheduling appointments with him. I
can't remember all of what Dr. Feld said, but it ended with him bluntly saying,
"I want his money" or “I want your dad’s money”.
I have informed my
mother and my current therapist, Dr. Vernice Wright, of this fact. I don't
remember whether I've told my father about it.
I believe that Dr.
Michael Feld purposely suppressed my discussion of my father’s mistreatment of
me. He did not allow my criticism of my father to go on for too long; he would
allow my father to simply deny what I said. Thus I justifiably felt unfree to discuss
more serious things my father has done to me (namely, the molestation). Feld
never heard anything about molestation.
I believe that Dr. Feld scammed me and my father, by not letting me discuss the possibility that my father abused me and was controlling my life. I believe that Dr. Feld did this on purpose, in order to avoid criticism of the person paying for the sessions, i.e., my father. Feld suffered from a conflict of interest which he [practically] admitted to me, when he said during the third or fourth session, “I want your dad’s money.” [when I mentioned the possibility of ending the sessions]
Feld was able to
get $1000 out of my father (five $200 sessions) by refraining from verbally
recognizing the signs of my father’s manipulative and controlling behavior, and
its effect over me. Feld was thus able to avoid risking [discussing] the chance that my
father was treating me that way because he didn’t want me talking about the
abuse.
I talked to my
ex-girlfriend, and then my mother, about the memories of molestation that had
come up, and my father found out. He said I was crazy and tried to put me on
antipsychotics after I hadn’t been diagnosed with anything. I didn’t even find
out the name of the medication until after my father conscripted my mother to
try to persuade me to take it.
Dr. Feld, and
possibly also Dr. Rappaport, not only committed psychiatric fraud; Feld or both
of them conspired with my father to drug me with neurotoxic drugs that remove
inhibitions and have many side effects, and a wide range of them.
Dr. Michael Feld
should be charged with committing psychiatric fraud for profit, by
intentionally causing harm to the patient (me) by allowing my father to speak
on my behalf during therapy. He violated the Hippocratic Oath to do no harm in
the process.
Feld should also be
charged with participating in a criminal conspiracy to suppress evidence of
child molestation, related to my ongoing case with the Lake Bluff Police (and
the Lake County State’s Attorney’s office), Lake Bluff Police case
number 19-13631.
It’s possible that Sol Rappaport knew that Dr.
Feld would not solve my problem.
Rappaport has been
described by past patient, on RateMDs.com, as “negligent”, “egotistical”,
“minimally present”, having “very little educational experience”, “seeming to
be more interested in money than in helping my wife or myself”, and as
vindicating the abuser while blaming an innocent spouse.
Rappaport should be charged with psychiatric fraud, and also with criminal negligence, in allowing a similarly negligent and profit-motivated psychiatrist, Dr. Feld, to solve “my father’s problem” (i.e., the problem of me coming forward about him molesting me as a child).
The remainder of my letter to the I.D.F.P.R. consists of the psychiatrically relevant excerpts from my research regarding Abilify, which I gathered in February and March 2021 and published to this blog in March 2021 under the title "Abilify and Other [']Atypical Antipsychotics['] Are Overprescribed, Dangerous, and Increase Some Psychotic Symptoms".
That full article can be read at the following link:
http://aquarianagrarian.blogspot.com/2021/03/abilify-and-other-atypical.html
Written and Published on April 28th, 2021
Edited and Expanded on April 30th and May 5th, 2021
Originally Published on April 28th, 2021
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