Showing posts with label spirituality. Show all posts
Showing posts with label spirituality. Show all posts

Tuesday, November 20, 2018

Links to All Articles Regarding Spiritual Financial Advice

     The articles found below were published in Issues magazine between July 2017 and October 2018. The first ten articles were published in my third book, Time Money Moon Value: Financial Advice for Shamans, under my real name, Joseph W. Kopsick.
     The other five articles have not been published in any book. Topics discussed in those articles include spiritual financial advice, and the election of myself (using the pseudonyms Jack Sampson and A. Non-Imus) to the spiritual and financial leadership of the Order of Celestial Integration, (which was previously headed by the prophet J.C. Meyers).
     These articles are works of satire, but they are also meant to reveal hidden truths about the relationship of superstition and apophenia to the studies of economics and monetary matters.
     Readers feeling left empty-handed after reading the final article in this list, and hoping to look deeper into the topics at hand, should study the "temple economy", as well as the features and characteristics of the rock in the Dome of the Rock, for more information.

     [Caution: The final five articles in this list were written while a cult was trying to brainwash me into being a fictional cult leader named Jack Sampson.]



1. "Yes, That Inanimate Object is Mocking You, and Here's Why:
     a Guide for Schizophrenics Trying to Get into Chaos Magick" (June 2017)
http://aquarianagrarian.blogspot.com/2017/06/yes-that-inanimate-object-is-mocking.html

2. "Investment Advice for Lunatics:
     Using Sigil Magick to Risk Nothing for Everything" (July 2017)
http://aquarianagrarian.blogspot.com/2017/07/investment-advice-for-lunatics-using.html

3. "Currency Wars:
     How to Game the System" (August 2017)
http://aquarianagrarian.blogspot.com/2017/08/currency-wars-how-to-game-system.html

4. "Why Yap Island Stone Coins Tanked on Friday" (September 2017)
http://aquarianagrarian.blogspot.com/2017/09/why-yap-island-stone-coins-tanked-on.html

5. "Shut Yer Yap:
     How to Starve Yourself Rich" (A Numismatic Exorcism) (October 2017)
http://aquarianagrarian.blogspot.com/2017/10/shut-yer-yap-how-to-starve-yourself.html

6. "Using Schizophrenia as a Powerful Creative and Introspective Tool" (November 2017)
http://aquarianagrarian.blogspot.com/2017/11/using-schizophrenia-as-powerful.html

7. "Crafting and Charging Your Sigil-Currency:
     How to Put Your Money to Work for You" (January 2018)
http://aquarianagrarian.blogspot.com/2018/01/crafting-and-charging-your-sigil.html

8. "Coping with a Faith-Based Currency:
     a Guide for the Uninitiated" (March 2018)
http://aquarianagrarian.blogspot.com/2018/03/coping-with-faith-based-currency-guide.html

9. "Appreciating Your Possessions:
     Extending Faith Through Extending Credit" (April 2018)
http://aquarianagrarian.blogspot.com/2018/04/appreciating-your-possessions-extending.html

10. "The Shibbolethic Talisman" (May 2018)
http://aquarianagrarian.blogspot.com/2018/05/the-shibbolethic-talisman.html

11. "How to Know God Through Investing in Memes", by Jack Sampson (August 2018)
http://aquarianagrarian.blogspot.com/2018/08/how-to-know-god-through-investing-in.html

12. "Jack for the Order:
     Independence from Meyers", by Jack Sampson (August 2018)
           Abbreviated Version (for publication in print):
http://aquarianagrarian.blogspot.com/2018/08/jack-for-order-independence-from-meyers_28.html
           Full Version:
http://aquarianagrarian.blogspot.com/2018/08/jack-for-order-independence-from-meyers.html

13. "I Hereby Retract My Identity", by A. Non-Imus (August 2018)
http://aquarianagrarian.blogspot.com/2018/08/i-hereby-retract-my-identity-by-non-imus.html

14. "Why I'm Right That the World Wouldn't Have Ended", by Jack Sampson (August 2018)
http://aquarianagrarian.blogspot.com/2018/08/why-im-right-that-world-wouldnt-have.html

15. "Ascetic Austerity:
     Demurrage is the Demiurge", by Jack Sampson (September 2018)
http://aquarianagrarian.blogspot.com/2018/09/ascetic-austerity-demurrage-is-demiurge.html












     Copies of Time Money Moon Value can be purchased directly from me for $12 ($10 plus shipping). Please email me at jwkopsick@gmail.com to request your copy! Ten copies are still available.
     My other books - two collections of my best essays from before 2017, titled Libertarian Conspiracy Theories and Soft Communism for 90's Kids - can be purchased by following this link, and clicking the links embedded within the page:
     http://aquarianagrarian.blogspot.com/2017/05/two-collections-of-essays-now-available.html



Post-Script:
     Articles #11-15 are the only articles I have written, and the only articles I ever will write, under the name of Jack Sampson or A. Non-Imus. Any and all other articles attributed to Jack Sampson, should be assumed to have been written by the staff of Issues magazine.








Links Compiled on November 21st, 2018

Introduction Written on November 21st, 2018

This Blog Entry Originally Published on November 21st, 2018

Post-Script Added on December 13th, 2018

Edited on December 19th, 2018 and February 28th, 2021

Imaged Added on December 20th, 2018

Edited on August 3rd, 2021 and
September 26th, 2021

Tuesday, September 18, 2018

Ascetic Austerity: Demurrage is the Demiurge, by Jack Sampson


     Yes, Eye confess! I hath killed J.C. Meyers.
     Granted, I understand where J.C. Meyers is cumming from. Eye no how it feels to stand corrected by Dirt. It happens to me all the Time.
     Being made to feel lower than Dirt is no more contemptible than pointing out that we are all the moistened, aerated, speaking soil, and that, as from ashes and dust we come, so to ashes and dust we go. All Must Serve the Cycle®.
     But She Who Threw a Binder at MeTM can never be forgiven. As I have killed J.C. Meyers before, so shall I kill her again, and $ave you heathens from her treachery.

     At Issues magazine, we appeal to a F.I.R.E. authority (that is, Finance, Insurance, and Real Estate). We invoke the gods of $alvation by building our church upon the fire-proof rock. And upon that which penetrates the rock, too; that saber of interrogating, golden-plating, all-Americating Light – once golden, once red - that cauterizes while it cuts, and witch we have all cum to know and glove so well.
     And through the whole of that rock, we shall ©. But you've heard all that before.
     What ye have knot yet heard, though, is how to fasten this hole tapestry together, by building upon this fire-proof rock not only our church, but our homes. For, just as all must either serve or be served – just as we shall submit to God, by killing God, by killing the god within ourselves, by killing ourselves – the F.I.R.E. authority must be submitted-to through (and hence overcome by) that same Hegelian sublation.
     This is to say that when we refuse to recognize that God has resolved not to stop us should we decide to usurp His throne, we build our homes and our churches (that is, our lives and our beliefs) out of flammable materials. Which creates an artificial need for fire insurance. All the insurance companies in the world could never insure against the wages of sin we will experience in Hell!
     Although this may sound like a statement assuring death, this is actually why it is within the reach – of any of us – to live forever, to judge all of mankind! Judge this notion if ye may, but if ye do, know that ye be judging as if ye thunk ye be but a god. Judgment of human value is necessary for a well-ordered civilization. At some level of the pyramid, each must serve.
     And that is why we all must starve ourselves to death.

     This program I call “Ascetic Austerity”.
     Just as I previously recommended saving money by eating less, and by eating parts of your own body, I now aim to advance a more general theory of shamanomics. This method of attaining financial and spiritual $aving$ simultaneously will help the Order of Celestial Integration and its members achieve moksha. And also to kill God.
     Did I mention that we're cutting your tithe to the low, low rate of 9.99%? This is the lowest tithe ever offered; not only in the history of the Order, but of mankind. It's not even strictly a tithe anymore, so We don't know how long we'll be able to continue this offer. So (Book of) Act(s) now, 4 this is a once-in-a-deathtime opPORTunity! We'd love to ti(th)e you off, so cum except the invocation!
     Before we 4get, Issues would like to remind its readers that SHAVINGS IS $AVING$. Did ewe no that 33.3% of what you remove when you shave is skin cells? And that includes little dried pieces of blood. But God does knot intend to waste those blood cells! EVERY HUMAN SELL IS PRE¢IOU$; read John 6:12Sew please, SEND US YOUR BLOOD - or at least the surplus, which you are not planning to immolate - to 824 N. Howell St., Rocky Mount, North Carolina, 27803, c/o Commodity Fetish Records.

     We promise that your efforts will knot be in vein.

     As I have elaborynthmaieuticated* in previous particles, part of the key to our $alvation is to overcome currency; just as Christ overcame death (and – lo – just as my dick over-came at your mom's house). And that means “Coins-On-The-Temple-Floor” -level savings for ewe!
     What this means, once again, is that we must replace all money and currency with either YIC (Yap Island stone Coins), some variant thereof, or BSTS (BloodCoin-SweatCoin-TearCoin-ShitCoin). That is, unless we are serious about implementing my Crypto-Oracle plan.
     Let's face it, most people have a soul, and most people have a Madonna single on compact disc in their home. And if you don't have one, then you have the other. It only takes a split-second to ask yourself why this fact does not virtually guarantee a fail-safe, free-floating, competitive, dual currency system.
     Yes, Crypto-Oracles are people. Just be glad you don't have to eat them. We here at Issues would never ask you to eat an artist; the industry eats them alive well enough as it is. You only have to ingest the artists' pre¢iou$ bodily fluids.
     For oracles are specially protected by our prayers, and by the Wall. Oracles are minor gods, and have access to portals to other dimensions about which we, their audience, know nothing. Just like the martyrs, they are more like real gods than the real gods, for we have proof of their existence, and they veritably died for our sins. Even if our gods and saviors are made-up, and never died in the first place, then we still have the martyrs and the saints as proof that humans can behave divinely. In a way, martyrs are a greater proof of God's existence than any savior could ever be.
     The only problem remaining to be solved is what to do given the intrinsic worthlessness of both the human soul and the Madonna single. Fortunately, that is where shamanomics comes in.

     That's right, I'm proposing auto-sarcophagic (self-eating) taxation.
     Why, you ask? It is only through seeing the snake-eyed dice of immortality floating like a magic 8-ball in the grimacing eye of Ouroborus, that we may be revealed the divine $e¢ret$ of “Tack-Say-Shun”. If Ewe say something bad about taxation, they'll shun Ewe, and then they'll at-tack Ewe, and tack Ewe up onto something.
     Unlike the divine Bush through witch God revealed Herself (some call this Bush “Kathy”), our efforts must give of ourselves. We must consume, while being consumed. As our souls burn with passion, we must allow that fire to consume us. After all, one man's insatiable quest that ends up killing him, is another man's free white whale ride!
     As Bukowski said, find what you love and let it kill you. Aren't humans and God just doing that do each other? Think of death as a love-hug. You can't overthrow God unless you disobey His commandment to not cling to loving one's hatred. You can't disappoint Richard Nixon unless you learn to hate your enemy just as much as he hates Ewe.
     This is why – or how, I forget – we will implement auto-sarcophagic taxation, and enforce Ascetic Austerity. Or else austere at you until you agree with me. Forsooth, we must envelop ourselves in a crystalline chrysalistic sarcophagus for our Christ crisis – a sort of womb-tomb – in order to devour ourselves through the self-flagellating taxation of our essences for prophet.
     We must allow the Order to continue to acquire new lands, tax-free. The Tithe Cut and the FloorCoin fund Will pay for it (because I Will It!TM).

     I mean, how else are today's edgy teens going to learn to dab, plank, nae-nae, t-pose and flex, so that they can go on yeeting in a spainging economy? By becoming Crypto-Oracles, of course! Not only this, but I also plan to implement a Voucher Program to supplement the Crypto-Oracle plan.
Simply put, we are eliminating all currency – even C.F.R.-issued 999 Economic Unit notes (though only as a temporary measure) – in order to usher in an experimental, moneyless intentional society.
     What this will involve, is finding artists, designating them Crypto-Oracles (which, to refresh your memory, is a crypto-numerological-magick-based device which generates divine symbols and domain names, and, eventually, the One True Name of GodTM), and issuing a promise that any Crypto-Oracle can opt to ask the Order to provide them with the skills necessary to become a voucher.
     What this means for Ewe, is that if Ewe are in need of anything, then one of our vouchers will come to your location, and vouch four you. If anyone refuses to give you something you need, based on the fact that the piece of paper you're trying to give them for it has the wrong set of numbers or the wrong dead man's face on it, then you can call one of our vouchers, and they'll show up and kick the ass (read: donkey) of whomever is fucking with you.
     After all, Ewe wouldn't want to cause a fasces faux pas, and get Coins On the Temple Floor®! For using standing armies to guard warehouses full of resources witch we need to survive, against the people whose needs give those goods all value, is the root of all evil. I mean value.
Time Money Moon Value.
     ...Yeah.

     Any weigh, the Oracle al0ne – especially while acting as The Holy Voucher – may proffer us the AURA-CLEARTM-ing clarity of meaning which comes through $alvifi¢ $alvation®. Only the Oracle extends this holey hand to us. As Christ puts His hand over the wound in His side, we must extend a finger into Him as our holy indulgence.
     Remember that DEMURRAGE IS THE DEMIURGE. Money burning a whole in your pocket is the main driver and motivator of all mortal action, and the cause (and collateral) of all investment.
     Which prayer does a Christian duck say when he is required to render his feathers for a place to stay? “And Now I Pay Me Down to Sleep”. The lesson of this is that the only weigh to pay down our debt, and the only weigh to make our hearts lighter than a feather, is to give of our own flesh, and to be taxed out of our own bodies.
     While usury is a fee paid for the privilege of using money, demurrage is a rent paid for the privilege of keeping money. The difference is eons apart! That's why to save money is as useless as it is to save a human being; just like currency, human beings are not meant to be saved, they are Meant 2 B SpentTM. That is, spent, through difficult labor; through hard, taxing work. Spent, before they lose value. TMMV (pbuh).
     For all we know, it's clinging to salvation that keeps us attached to this world, and stops our souls from transcending.
     Think!: Whose money is in your pocket? Whose face is on it? Give it back to him. Lay it on his grave if you have to. It is better to have to draw only Muhammad, than to have to draw a Lot. Paying interest on your money is the only way to - as the great Grey the Grey deGrey the Great taught us - “show an interest in what you save, show an interest in who you save”.
     And so, verily, I say unto thee: doest thou a thing!
     For God does not close a window without opening a million other tabs.



     * = elaborynthmaieuticate (verb): 1. To act as both an “intellectual midwife” (or “maieutic doula”) and a “maze tour guide” at once; to elaborate and explain, in order to assist in the expression or birth of a thought, as if guiding that thought through a labyrinth.



Written and Originally Published on September 18th, 2018


Appeared in the October 2018 edition of Issues magazine

Tuesday, August 28, 2018

I Hereby Retract My Identity, by A. Non-Imus


     High, They're! It’s me again, Winston Smith. Fuckin' or is it? I’ve edited so much already, it could change at any moment. Like ya do. But I can do nothing but Edit (I certainly can’t right worth a damn). Would that things were the Abbasid way around. And so, I am Winston, I am Joe; I'm Jack, I'm Joe-Jack; I'm J.C., and Nostra. Just as I am Lowered, so Eye am Lord.
     Nostra diVarious, that is. Not E Pluribus Unum (“one out of many”), but Nostra diVarious: “ours out of many”. Be ye man or mashup artist, a human identity is one which is cobbled together out of many characters, personas, and masques; real and fictional alike (if any of us can be said to be real at all). That's the Nature of our sacred discourse, and our scared Discord; that's why it's sin our Nature to sew this c(h)ord.
     Ernie Wayne of the family Tertelgte, the mountain man who speaks with the voice of the wind, hath proclaimed that you are not your name; you are not in the flesh what you are scrawled onto papyrus or chiseled into stone.
     It’s not that I am no longer Joseph William Kopsick; I was never THAT (praise Bernie). And certainly not the all-caps version thereof. I “am” Joseph William of the family Kopsick. More accurately, I “am” named Joseph William. But in truth, I was named Joseph William, by the family Kopsick. But your middle name is your real name, so Will I Am. I can Will-ingly change my name. ...You see what I'm gettin' at? Take your name back into your own.
     Edit. Better. I Don’t Know My Name. It’s all there in the words of Respect, Will and Grace. And so, out of deference to “them” (even though Martin Buber says “they” don't exist), I retract my name, my nicknames, and my identity, which shall Hereafter be considered in flux.
     Like a cat retracts its claws – and like a lawmaker retr(o)acts its clause – I hereby retract all of my characters, masques, personas, titles, and claim to the throne of Imperial Russia (I know, right?).
It’s not that Time, Money, Moon, Value! didn’t sell well; it’s that Fayporwave didn’t sell well. …Of course, it doesn’t help that Fayporwave was not then released, nor moreover that it is still unreleased. But that is ear-elephant, for J.C. Meyers hath called for more prophets. And so we say unto thee: “Give Us Your Money”. Money for Nothing, cucks.
     After all, I – “Joseph”, for most purposes – am He whom “God will increa$e”, as was profitcied. God is Will incarnate, and so am I. My won true name is “He who bought lifetime peace for a dollar at Skygate, the reflector of Heaven”, but that won't fit on a puny mortal government document, so I'm forced to improvise.
     Yea, a single dollar bought Me everlasting Peace – work smoothly lifetime peace – for a dollar. I’ll buy that for a dollar!TM And you can have lifetime peace too; not from any Buddhist amulet, but by giving “me” a dollar donation after listening to Fayporwave “for free” online, when it comes out. Fulfill the profit, see? Listen to it now, before it's released, before it's realized!
     Like “my” other mashup albums, this album is “mine”, but only in the sense that I have mined the great American songbook to create them. But I have given them to you, and taken ours to complete them, for just as the past tense of “mind” ought to be “mound”, what’s yorus's is Horus's, and what's mound takes ours, cat.
     I’m Not the One who did those things, who performed all those miracles, anyway. Waterfall After all, who am Id to say who Id am? I damn well d k. The person who made those mashups - and wrote that financial advice for witch doctors and crazy people – that is not who I am today. I didn't build that, someone else did that.®
     I am officially embarking upon a dissociative episode solely in order to disown my authorship of my music. Who I am is simply too unstable to continue as a single person(a) without faction and fracture. I shall soon release myself from this Herculean burden by making the legend (that is, the Key) public. Like a soldier who does more before 5 A.M. than you do all day; or like Bob Dylan, who experiences himself as five different people before breakfast; or like the Yakuza, who’ll kill ya five times before you hit the ground; YHWH a different person every 1 to 45 seconds.
     The little flying robot from Flubber hath taught me well; for that is the true teaching of Madonna: to change your identity every time the song does. Look up the word theotokos and you'll see that there really is something about Mary: She's All THAT, and She(s) beckon(s).
     And that is what listening to Nostra diVarious is like (if I may be so bold as to review “my own” - aw, who am I kidding - your work). And that’s because that’s what it’s like to listen to no Stradivarius – or Nostradamus, Ghostradamus, or Boastradamus (the savant who brags about his prophecies), too – for that matter. And so, brav@ to You! Your album rocked. You need to quantize shit better and snap that shit to the grid, but yeah. I liked what I saw, and I saw this.
     Thus, I retract not only my name, identity, personas, titles, and musical “authorship” (that is, if you consider hyper-sampling with a white dude reggae-scatting over it an “art form”); I also renounce my claims to my work Time, Money, Moon, Value!. Not only do I welcome the unauthorized copying and plagiarism of, and profiteering from, the booklet I have created; I encourage it (provided that one dodges taxes)!. Try and enforce that, U.S. Patent Office!
     In fact – not that you needed my permission - I hereby authorize the book's continual release and re-release to the public, by whomever pleases... with whichever edits they please! It'll be just like TheTM bible! ...Hey, as long as you Do a Goddamn Thing. [Witch, if I’m not mistaken, is the name of the latest Spike Lee joint.]
     I annihilate my self at the sacred foot of Indra; I annihilate myself at the foot of The Thunder, Perfect Mind. I sublimate myself to the sublime. I retract my authorship, my Arthurship, my othership, and my mothership. Also, as I renounce my claim to the thrown, I hereby retract my Dong (VND) from the Church; that is, from the Holy Cigar Cutter, the Great Cele$tial $perm Bank. That's right, my dick is going public; this is the initial pubic offering.
     As such, I am halting my collaboration with the Order until such time as I may regain my entity.
     I also retract my foreskin while I retract my identity.

     P.S.: I hereby retract this article.
     That's a rap.
     What.




Written on June 22nd, 2018
Originally Published in the July 2018 issue of Issues magazine
First Published to this Blog on August 28th, 2018

Tuesday, January 16, 2018

Crafting and Charging Your Sigil-Currency: How to Put Your Money to Work for You

     As Eisenhower chided (chode?), “The world in arms is not spending money alone. It is spending the sweat of its laborers, the genius of its scientists, the hopes of its children.” General Patton, too, remarked that “A pint of sweat will save a gallon of blood.” In Biblical times, a talent (or kikkār) was a measurement of a particularly-sized disk-shaped loaf, made of gold or silver; the monetary equivalent of twenty years' wages.
     These facts ought to show that the use of talent, genius, hopes, and dreams as a way of backing currency, are already widely accepted. This, and the existence of an e-currency called SweatCoin, ought to show that sweat is accepted just as widely, if not more. Additionally, the U.S. Federal Reserve has set the standard; a currency with no human fluids on it will not survive in today's fast-paced currency seller's market. That is why we must forge a currency of sweat.
     However, a document covered in sweat can serve as a fine substitute. There's no way to perfectly imitate that head-swelling, confidence-instilling feeling - like the feeling of some cleansing flu coming on - of that most coveted and elusive of currencies; Man. But what better way to counterfeit the witchy of the itchy and the sticky of the icky of the way humons feel, than by smearing your moneys with human transmission fluid?
     Get high off of your money. If you can't get V.D. from your money, then You're Not Doing It RightTM. If you've no blood nor sweat to spare, then as the saying goes: You'd better get busy crying, or get busy scrying.

     If the value of a money comes from its shine, then where doth its value lay? Hark!, where, when the paternal, miserly Sun hides from mere mortals for fear of his mistress Luna, as if She were some attention-starved solar-powered vehicle (just as fair Gaia)? We may only know by using the very Sun as our astrolabe – and probably as our ass too, if you ask Georges Bataille – that is, by using the Sun itself as our sundial and timepiece.
     Would that I could but snatch the Sun and Moon out the very Heavens for thee, and gift them to you as currencies, untaxable by the gods. But the best I can do is write these Letters. For the Sun and Moon are round yet flat; just like the Earth, coins, and our callous hearts. Amun RaShi'Amun Rocks.
     Through replacing the money in our pockets with miniature sundials, our currency will stay current, and we will be all paid-up on our phone bill to G-d. We can even dial-up the Messiah, to hear The Message, and the ephemeral Operator will inform us of the True Cosmic Time. Then we can finally find out whether Jesus was trying to tell us it was 2:45, 3:45, 8:15, or 9:15. I mean, Christ on a clock!
     Yea, for a Solstice has come to pass! To watch the seasons, and Sun and Moon, is to gently rock the cradle of civilization, to push the perambulator of progress, to tend the Garden of the stationary Church-house-wife. It is the cosanguine Nile of the suburbs. That is why we may no Know-Religion until we know No-Religion. And only through the No-Religion may we practice the All-Religion, the Night-Religion, and the Day-Religion of Duty, and deliver our End of the Covenant.

     So it was that those who had come to bask in the warmth of the Son had also come to call it their god, and rely on it. Just as it was hours later, when their god deserted them; mocking them, laying them bare, cool and dry, vulnerable to the stare of the (K)night-King.
     But Lo!, for a second light – a lesser Light - did govern the Sky, during fearsome Night! The people rejoiced, gave thanks for this grace, and took heart. They trusted their Moon-Goddess; she governed the Heavens so as to make the very trains run on time! Truly She were a goddess to whom mortals could set their watches, and even their calendars!
     But this mild, innocuous Lunacy grew feverish, bringing Discord. And what Luna see, Luna do. They feared the Son would never return. Some began to believe they didn't need Him. Moon-tanning boomed as an industry. The vampires' unions went too far and then got complacent. Bad times were had by all.
     But the Morn broke nevertheless, and the Lord of Light scalded dry the winter-parched faces of the Draculistic Moonites with the sight of the unforgiving day. This was the same chasmed flesh which had once worn dry as caked desert mud from haloed Luna-C's glowering glow; halo-lujah.
     Fuckin' way she goes; same shit, different millennium. For to God, every day is like a thousand fears. ...Here's to another 365 of those shits.

     But after but after but; this is the nature of the koan. Forsooth, I like big buts, and I cannot lie; to lie is to call the Eternal But anything but samsara. It is to make it the but of the joke. For Our Lord Kurt Cobain, of the Holy Trinity of Nirvana, freed us from the cycle of what the Buddha termed the Cycle of Buts. This is what is truly meant by “Get thee behind me, Satan!”. No amount of Time, nor The Waiting, can free us from the Eternal But. If it can, then it is not the Eternal But.
     But that is the Nature of Time; we don't have Time to talk about Time. Time may be money, but as Tha Boi warned us, “Time won't give me time, and time makes lovers feel like they've got something real”. And if time won't give you time, then it's no better than a money that doesn't make you more money while you're sleeping.
     The Black Hole Son can only redeem us (for value) insofar as He can symbolically store our value. If Time is at all fleeting - and it is - then time and permanence cannot be rightfully described as countrymen, thus serving as a store of value in any real sense proves difficult. But through conquering the Word - and defeating the demonic, time-stealing scoundrel Hypnos - this dissonant disconnect between Time and Value can be bridged, transcended, and overcome.
     This Letter is about making a sigil. A sigil for your vigil.

     That I may lead you, the reading novice magick practitioner, out of the sweat-shop and into the Light, so that you may pick the Golden Rays from the very Air.
     This is about how to create your sigil, and how to craft it into a sigil-based currency. Moreover, how to charge it; the same way you charge a credit card, or charge an innocent god with a crime He didn't commit. Only then may we conduct this Alchymical Wedding between Spirit and Flesh (the same way you would conduct lightning to yourself, or an orchestra. Or conduct an orchestra).
     The task before us is to transmute mercury into gold; to get blood from stone. And remember, blood is mostly water, so if Moses got water from a stone, then blood isn't a far Leap away. If Moe can do it, yo can do it. It's right there in his name: “Moe's us!”
     That's right, all your months of hard work are about to pay off! Collecting these instructions, ritualistically inducing trance states so as to emit ecstatic glossolalia, generating letter after word after symbol after emoji after cryptogram after codex after sigil after seal after amulet after talisman after primordial language after ancient number that nobody's ever heard of, while a bunch of clothespins hang off of your dangly bits.
     Did you forget to do that? Oh. Well, I did mention to get a job as part of all this? No? ...Actually, that's perfect, you have nothing to work with. Just as Socrates was a genius because he admitted he knew nothing, so too must the fabrication of a Faberge egg begin with its negation; through piercing. This ain't the Seven Dolours of Mary here, it's just like getting your hand pierced. And as it may as well have said in 1 Timothy 2:9: “You can't be beautiful until somebody pokes a hole in you.”
     Look away, and think on this: Piercing the one creates a zero within it. How many zeroes? One. As zero is defined self-antithetically as the absence of value or number, it is both a number and not a number. How many numbers is it? One. But how many numbers isn't it? All of them. This is the nature of non-Euclidean hyper-numeric out-forming.
     This principle is best symbolized by Sisyphus (1) pushing Ouroboros (0) up a hill. The self-completion of Nothingness gives rise to the One, to raise it. All positive and negative value comes from within or without the 0. This is what the Kingdom of God is like.

     Yes, that's right; act now, for the Black Hole Son is the demiurgic furnace of Creation; that supercollider of supercolliders, the Lord's personal microwave, from which the All-Yet-What-It-Is-Ness and the Not-But-What-It-Do-Ness spewluminate and spewmerge from the Hotness of the Notness. This is why the knowledge that A does not equal A, is the fountain pen of all ObjectiveTM Human No-Ledge. For there is (k)No(w)Ledge Beyond the Edge.
     That's why lack of a ledge to stand on is a desirable quality to possess. For even if the sigils you manifested were too hardcore to translate into English – much less millions in domain names profits – then the only real portfolio you need is within your own mind; it is your Memories. While the First Rule of Sigil Money is that You'veTM GotTM aTM PortfolioTM toTM MaintainTM, there is dispute over whether “There is No Second Rule of Sigil Money” in fact constitutes a second rule. But this should not come as unexpected, for in the very same way that 2 emerges from 1, so does 1 emerge from 0, and vice-versa. It's kind of like removing a square peg from a round slot.
     This is to say that you can't get into Heaven unless you can fit through Jesus's ribcage wound to get inside of it. And that hole wouldn't be whole if some asshole centurion hadn't gone and done a damn thing, and Doubting Thomas hadn't stopped by to open-up old zounds. Above all, it's harder to thread the Hole to Heaven if you have a plank in your own eye that prevents you from pointing our the camel in the eye of the needle. Basically, the more valuable and precious the memories you've stored in your mind, the more Value® you can sneak into Heaven.
     Though ye may lack possessions, ye still have some number of sword and cup. I mean, whether getting rid of all your possessions will get you into Heaven or not, then if you are getting in, then whatever is inside you is also getting in. Eh? Eh? So why not swallow a couple'a cigarette packs? Where there's clouds, there's cigarettes. Why not turn yourself into a drug mule while you're at it? What, do you think there's nobody in Heaven who likes drugs!? This is how you can raise your Value® without weighing yourself down spiritually. Make yourself use-full!

     As you'll recall from earlier, the hole in the donut signifies the debt which is built into the dollar. Money is weighted with debt - so as to anchor it to Gaia, lest it dash adventurously off to reach the lofty Spheres – and in order to inculcate into the bill an imperative to spend. In this manner shall we rein spending Power into our own sigils, like St. Nicholas herding reindeer with his Lightning Command of the Word. As money now commands us to spend it, so shall we soon command it to spend itself; through seduction.
      The value of Money (that is, money as we know it) cannot be acquired without spending; this discharges the debt, allowing the spender to redeem the interest (that is, the cost of using money which he incurred in choosing that currency in particular). Basically, money is only useful once you Get Rid of ItTM. Just like a god.
     Also, conveniently, just like a sigil. If you want to truly keep something, then you must spiritually possess it, by preparing to let it go. If it comes back to you, then it was meant to be. Only then may you buy your future back through the flames. As has been said, “You don't know what you've got 'til it's gone”; just like the manna in which golf is scored, the value of possessing a sigil-currency lies in its non-possession. One year you won't want to be caught without money, the next you won't want to be caught with it. You won't know until it's All-Too-Not-Just-Late-Enough.TM
     The less you have, the closer to Zero you are, the more you appreciate what you do have. This is what it means to live by God's grace, to live in God's hands. To do this is to manifest financial appreciation through acts of intellectual and emotional appreciation. As each of ye bead a precious jewel with innumerable facets, different yet equal in the unparallelable uniqueness which knows no degree but only absolute. Thus, uniqueness – your Unique, at that - may never be diminished nor demeaned.

     Verily I say unto thee: by the time this is over, you will see the Kingdom of God with your own eyes. More importantly, you will have learned to not trap, but catch your intentions, uponto your sigil, without nailing it down and accidentally killing it. This will allow you to practice what we shall call the Entomology of the Word, so that you may treat the flowers as Osho besought.

     Even if you can only do it as part of a simulation, living near Zero - at the edge of nothingness and annihilation - is the only way to gain the perspective necessary to understand that mankind must create a currency whose value is inversely proportionate to the level of human suffering which caused it.
     To paraphrase Matthew 5:3-6, the squeaky wheel gets the grease, and getting hurt is a sure way to get people to pay attention to you. To do this is to “make yourself scarce”; so rare that you nearly fade-away into NothingTM, and your value's wave-function collapses into a shit-line. But fear not; if you strike yourself down, you shall become more valuable than you can possibly imagine.
     Just as you can claim a flower - without picking it, nor killing it – by uprooting it, so too can you obtain the humour of your choice, and transfer it onto the document that will wield your sigil. (Note: humours are herein referred to as both Flesh and Spiritus, not to be confused with Spirit.) However, you will not be trapping spiritual powers, nor intentions, nor fluids; but catching them, as you would a dream with a dream-catcher.

     This document you use may be of paper, papyrus, vellum, parchment, buck-skin, Charlie Manskin, or a grimoire made of human flesh. Use whatever's handy. Even literally; use your own hand if nothing else is available. After all, as Mr. Wright noted, it's easier to read someone's palms if there's something already written on them.
     Your goal will be to keep record of significance, and a souvenir of your illusory physical body (ectoplasm), with - and on - this codex. This will allow you to delicately “capture” the spiritual union of Spirit with Flesh, but not in the same way that every time you nail something into the ground, you're driving a nail through the Body of Christ, and preventing both Jubilee and the Second Coming. This way is less painful (depending on who you ask).
     Additionally, you must lay a trap for Fire; so that it may act as your Servant, rather than your Serpent. Fire, as students of Richard Feynman will attest, is a kind of spiritual lightning, which mortals refer to as “electricity”. Once you have trapped your fluids with your sigil, the fluids (spirits) become your prisoners, and begin to go to work inside your money, to make more money for you. The walls of this numismatic prison insulate the economy against all designs of electric and economic shock; from Nixon Shock, to China Shock, to the risk of e-Weapondollar Shock (posed by mounting speculation in 3-D-printed-handgun-backed currencies).
     That's why lighting your humour-moistened sigil-currency with Holy Fire - “charging your sigil” - results in a sticky electrical discharge that's nearly as delicious and refreshing as what Natasha spells backwards. Lick your sigil while you're at it, there's no sense in wasting good saliva. More saliva donations to the Fire is more saliva donations to Commodity Fetish Records.
     Licking the sigil, just as well, serves to Mark it as yours; this is termed “Homesteading by the Tongue”. You may recall this property-claiming process from your youth. If you lick it, it becomes not just yours, but a part of you, because it's covered in your Flesh.

     To set your Spiritus-meshed Mooney ablaze with Light, is to literally electrocute the Money-Moon-Men inside of it, by the Thunder of Zeus! Again, just like a credit card. Once it's your property, you can do anything you want with it; trade it away, burn it, eat it in order to gain its power, even destroy it by selling it to the Fire.
     These rituals - exposed to the open Air, and uniting Handwater with Meat, Will, and Fury - alone ensure the Union of the four classical elements Fire, Earth, Air, and Water. A voodoo monetary theory which does not accept this Union as essential to the creation of value, does not comprehend the true natural law of moonetary exchange. The Union of Flesh with Spirit and Word, and Faith with Works, and Time with Money and Moon, the same.
     The good people at Commodity Fetish Records believe in your True Value, that it would be impossible to calculate your value; that you are invaluable. That's why we're proud to offer a generous commensurate sum of a whopping Zero® Economic Units for your donations! (Disclaimer: We will be testing your emissions for drugs. Just like your Boss, Cool Guy SatanTM takes only the purest, least adulterated samples.)

     Once you've chosen which fluid or fluids you will apply to your sigil – be it spit, sweat, urine, ass-milk, or handwater (that's “blood” to the layman) – you will be prepared to transmute the humours of your tumours from-within-out-onto the parchment.
     But prior to applying Spiritus, you must make your sigil manifest. Draw a simple design – this could be anything; an assortment of lines and curves, a doodle, a flag, a crest or coat of arms, an established magickal amulet or talisman, really anything – and think of it as a symbol or logo. Next, assign it a meaning, and telekinetically imbue it with your intentions. Stop just short of inflicting your Will upon it; save that for human beings.
     With your mind's eye, give the symbol a meaning that represents what you wish to manifest; this could be a simple task with which you need spiritual assistance, or as high-minded as your wildest hopes and dreams. Visualize yourself surrendering what you lack, in order to lose something negative, in order to make gains (say it with me... Chris Gaines). Simply put, let go of what is holding you back, so sayeth the Emperor. This is how you make trades while staying out of both the red and the black; praise Eleggua, fuck Vegas.
     Meditate upon the symbol, and upon the meaning you have projected onto it. As best you can, memorize the shape of what you have drawn. Release your physical attachment to the document (now made Spirit-Flesh), while simultaneously pretending to, and pretending not to, release spiritual attachment. Having prepared to let go of the sigil-currency – and, with it, physical and symbolic parts of yourself – you may now feed your Spirit-Flesh to the Fire (yourself or the document, there's really no wrong choice here).

     What do I do for a living? It doesn't matter. What's important is that I make money. Whatever my job looks like it is, my real job is, ultimately, to make money. But all that aside, what did I buy a shit-ton of when I got my first paycheck? Beads. Why beads? “Why beads?”!? You know how many beads the island of Manhattan would be worth today, if you accounted for bead inflation? Quadrillions!
     So fuck with a sigil. Draw a simple and make it symbol. Blow it up, and charge it with spiritual fire, then push credit or debit, and you're approved! Put a bead on it. Draw a bead on your sigil. Draw a bead of sweat onto your sigil. 'ell, draw a bead of cum, no less. Cum On A Sigil, so sayeth Sri J.C. Meyers, may Her Name Echo into Eternity. I mean, everybody's doin' it!
     Though ye may say, “Well then, if everybody jumped off a cliff, would you?” Hell yes I would, there'd be nobody to hang out with! Am I to waste away and wait for withered Thanatos to portend his mulish, desiccating jowls thither and thence across my visage? Forshook!
     Though cum be, too, fleeting - just like Time and Life (nay, yet also Glamour, and National Geographic) – what is money without a little bit of cum on it? The transitory, vagabond-like nature of cum, is – like the Black Hole Son – a furnace of creation, albeit housed in the River Nile, while the other is housed in the Ceiling (cielo). Thus is the nature of the fiscal cliff, of God, and of currency.
     And, yes, ass-beads ought to work just fine, as long as they're not cleaned beforehand.

     As the usurpers must be killed with kindness, so shall all blood, sweat, and tears (BST) be repaid in kind; whether to boss, landlord, or humanoid cloud of pumice-colored plasmic cinder. Those who work us, must work for us; especially if our lazy money refuses to. Just as every man shall be a king, and each house his castle, so shall each person be a central banker.
     Literally make it your job to make money. When it comes to counterfeiting operations, you've gotta spend money to make money. The only difference in legitimacy is whose money you spend to get things started.
     If this doesn't make sense, don't worry; it doesn't have to. What matters is that you employ some sort of logical loop in your defense of your currency of your choice. That you take the cum-glossed ghosts made of spiritual electrical-fire which dance inside of your money, and put them inside of a hamster wheel, that is shaped like that very same logical loop, which is alone the source of value, it being also shaped like a coin, and the impostor “number” zero.
     This is like Sesame Street, except the Count never leaves the screen.

     And this is what The Count hath taught us; for, just as money comes from blood, blood comes from water, and water comes from the moon, if Moon-Goddess is the source of all, then She is the source of Mooney, Blood-Money, and Handwater alike. She alone May quell the perturbed tempest of Draculistic Moonies wreaking havoc upon our quiet little town.
     For blood – not blockchain – is the real Keeper of Record of transactions; that Ancient Historian, Holder of Value, the RNA to the RZA to the GZA. The Declaration of Independence might as well have been written and signed in blood, considering how well-aware the revolutionaries were that they were pledging their very lives and lifeblood to one-another, in defense of each other's property. Then how hard would it have been for Nicolas Cage to read?
     Look at it this way: No blood money, no blood oaths. No blood oaths, no blood vigils. No blood vigils, no blood moons, no blood supermoons... But all this can be aided and betted with even the smallest donation. After all, blood's value is high, stable, and robust; owing to the need of it, and demand for it; for transfusions, research, etc..
     Also, blood can be easily transported. Shit, your body does it for you. Moreover, God knows how easily blood spreads. In fact, it's the only currency that's accepted everywhere! What do you think when you see blood? Exactly!; “Damn, the violence in the world is something that I need to accept.”! Blood: It's everywhere you want to be!
     Blood is, also, 100% proof positive of eating. That he who does not eat, neither shall he maketh bludd. And what to blood cells look like? Little donuts! “What does it mean?” Fuckin' you tell me!

     Most importantly, as anarchist Bach Dorein attests, blood is “a bodily fluid that carries all of your genetic material”, which enables both parties to be identified if need be.
     Furthermore, each drop of blood, bead of sweat, or cummie (CUM), serves as an easily divisible unit-share of the currency-stock BST, which is basically a basket of similar human-resource-backed currencies, grouped together so as to pool risk if one of them goes under. These drops (or beads) are valued inversely in proportion to the debt of the unique individual human being from which it came (and which it “represents”, heh-heh-heh).
     It's like a blind trust, except what's being traded is being treated like a currency more than like a stock, and it runs almost like a cooperative model. What this means is that each investor can easily own – upon request of delivery, with postage paid by the recipient – Pieces of You. This enables each investor (remember, that includes you, at least potentially) to have a 100% bona-fide record of the genetic material of all parties to your contract.
     This “currency” (more accurately, a whole mode of exchange unto itself) will allow a creditor to clone his debtor, from his blood, and work the clone until the debt has been paid back in full! At which point the creditor is free to dispose of the clone at will, having created it in the first place. You cannot truly own what you do not create. This is the mode of money management which is most in-keeping with the lessons in the Lord's Prayer. Don't like it? Clone yourself! Jesus did. Remember? He made that sheep? I think he called it Salvador Dolly.
     According to Dorein, when “Loss of property, loss of bodily parts, loss of life are all consequences”, in addition to loss of blood, the “Mutual threat of extreme violence” will “maintain peace”, and the “Mutual threat of death will keep everybody in line”, in much the same manner in which the threat of mutually-assured destruction seemed to help stave-off a nuclear exchange during the Cold War.
     That blood money be our currency, and blood oaths be our Constitution. May blood Serve as a check and a cheque; a contract on which its users declare their independence from the trappings of mortality and the tyranny of monocurrency.
     Perhaps blood's use as a sort of primordial blockchain could even be augmented through genetic engineering! Wouldn't you like to fill your pockets each morning with G.M.O. chimera-borg babies, whose parents are everybody who has ever used blood money!?
     And don't get me started on the possibility of trading blood derivatives!

     This is the logos you must embrace if your will is to make the world safe for Chaos, with Chaos. For Chaos, like Zero, clears room for itself, and thus makes all else (including the One) possible.
     Just as 1 comes from nothingness, so too do the magick and the Muse only visit the shaman in full force of fury as a novice. To experience this is to know true passive magick; to be used as a mere vessel for the Word.
     So, as Timothy Leary famously said, "Induce trance states, patent yourself as a crypto-numerological random number generator, and cash in."



Written Between January 13th and 16th, 2018

Edited on January 17th and March 14th, 2018

Monday, August 14, 2017

Currency Wars: How to Game the System

            The Pharaohs were right again, there is a war coming!
            That’s right, a war is brewing – in a pyramid-shaped brewery, no less – between currencies. This is not a mere battle between coins and paper, but one between very currencies and moneys themselves!

            This being anything other than a game of rock-paper-scissors, the John Nashes among us can return from our C.I.A.-backed drawing boards (or, rather, conspiracy webs). I mean, let’s not kid ourselves, we have a faith-based currency. Fiat currency is literally backed by say-so.
            Thus, it is not socio-cultural convention that dictates the value of the USD; it is power. From time immemorial, currencies have always been backed by power, from the labor conditions that accompanied the mining of currencies’ materials, to the conditions which brought about the widespread acceptance (“accept” being the operative word) of the currency.
Nobody begs for currency (except when they do; really, except when they need to). It was always power that gave value to these worthless little unpossessed trinkets (unpossessed in both senses of the word) in our pockets. That’s why ours must be a monetary theory predicated upon the veracity of the Power Theory of Value.
            Most of us view currencies and moneys as having a distinction and/or a difference, but the waxing crescent will soon reveal where our real values lie. This is why our masterless masters tell us; money is a real store of value, while currency is a representation. Currency is a symbol, a spectre, a spook, a phantasm, a dybbuk; it has no real value in and of itself. And just like a dybbuk or a vampire, or Jesus or God, it cannot come in – cannot receive your value, your credit, your belief – unless you invite it in.
That is, unless the currency you use is living.

            This is why how much money you get for your work, and what you spend your money on, are less valuable than what your choice of money (or currency) is in the first place.
I mean, if you conduct all of your transactions in wampum, you’re not going to be very successful unless you only trade with the Seneca and the Onondaga, or you want to move a lot of quahog shells in general. Or beaver pelts, for that matter; both make excellent currencies. All I’m saying is that resource-backed currencies are making a comeback, I’m not trying to make any value judgments.
Now it’s time to make some value judgments.
The truly best way to game the system is to make it your 40-hours-a-week business to decide how much each currency is worth relative to the others. That’s how European banking dynasties have always kept it in the black. And they’re Knights Exemplars of business ethics, for fuck’s sake.
The lessons of Hephaestus (the god of metals) are thus clear: understand the price of money, and buy and sell money. Buy money with money, it’s solid investment advice!

As you may remember from the last time (or the last piece; really, the last timepiece, the real Holder of Value, the real Keeper of Records, the real Signifier of Honor), it is a most pressing issue in today’s economy as to whether moneys and currencies derive their value from nature or from nurture.
Answering this question will be the key to discovery as to which forms of currency and money are based on power, violence, and intimidation.
I believe that a lunar currency will ultimately prove a more durable store of value, but that’s beside the point. This is not Sinfowars, neither is it No-Spin-Zone-Fo-Wars; this is pure competitive currency, the realm of numismatic pataphilosophy to which we must all eventually surrender.
But surrender we must to the subconscious realm of pure speculation. For ours is an economy based on faith, speculation, game, grime, gift, grift, and gank. That is, especially, speculation in land; this is why Geonomics must be synthesized with Geomancy.

Putting stock in your beliefs means investing in your beliefs.
If (for example) a hob-goblin who practices hoodoo tells you-doo that two-two is gonna win you the craps game, don’t think of it in terms of a cost-benefit analysis, or as a matter of wise or unwise investments. It’s all in the risk.
Use the hob-goblin as an avatar of Mammon, and use numerology to deconstruct the number 22 into its relevant values and meanings. If the angels are in the cards, play the goblin. If not, justify things according to your caprice; just let it ride.
The fundamental theorems of welfare economics tell us that one of the conditions for totally free markets (that is, perfect competition and fully interconnected markets) entails total freedom to bet on future states of affairs, as long as the bets are backed up 100% by existing assets.
So an economy based on gambling (in addition to game) is still potentially in the cards.

As Emperor Ryan taught us, “Don’t bet the house, be the house.”
Lord Petyr, too, taught that you must be willing to risk everything you have for everything you want. This is why we must gamble our lives away, for a chance at money, a chance at fame, a chance at immortality, a chance at our 15 minutes in the bacon grease. There Are No Masters Through Meyers.
And Greg, may he rest in peace, imparted that, essentially: bubbles, and volatility in markets and of currencies, affect only those who invest in them. This is why booze, strippers, and craps make for promising short-term fiduciary stratagema.
In the long term, invest in death. For an underdog, long-shot, or short-sell, buy immortality.
But this eclipses the wider point: Why use USD – a national currency covered in stripper sweat, trace amounts of feces and human skin, and toxic chemicals – when you could use a currency made of human skin? I’m not talking about soylent leather-cheques, those are so last recession season. I’m talkin’ about good old Uncle Charlie Manskin, you Prudent investors.
Hookers and blow, too, are recession-proof (and certainly depression-proof). This is what Greg has taught us, Put a Bird Upon Him (pbuh). That’s why you should hedge your bets with bush. Additionally, spending other people’s money counts as short selling.
But yea, you can vote yourself richer; by voting with your wallet, while you vote with your feet, as long as you pull yourself up by your bootstraps, hold on to your immigration papers, and bereave in yourself!
George said the only thing that makes him not a Pope is that billions of people don’t think he is. Likewise, David taught that the Pope could walk into a casino, call the wrong number at craps, and still walk away with billions of dollars, claiming infallibility.
This much we know to be true. But where do we go from here, knowing that money is the root of all evil, and that it’s impossible to serve two gods?

We must demand either a lunar-time-backed currency, or else at least a lunar calendar, as a compromise with the lunatic proles fringe.
I mean, literally (and I mean the word “literally” literally) billions of people know that time and money have a certain level of equivalence with one another. Almost as many believe, rightly, that there are 383 ½ days, divided into 13 months, in a year.
But few understand that – while the solar system is a clock that works off of a 64-multiplying-fractal-/-cyclical-linear historiological-astrological-symbolic repetition pattern, going backward from the Singularity point in the morning of December 21st, 2012, at the cusp of the Piscean and Aquarian Ages – the Moon plays a demiurgic role in calibrating the ticking-and-talking of the Universe. And this is not just McKenna’s clockwork gnomes talking, this is some straight-up Anaxagoras shit.
How do you make money? Four words: “Distrust but independently verify”. But the question remains: how do you (the reader) gamble in a casino that doesn’t accept moon-based currencies, communion wafers, tokens that aren’t completely useless as fetishes, or Manskin? There’s no use beating around the hedge fund, I’ll spare you the buckskin euphemism.
The Cosmic Clock Theory allows us to foresee the mass use of TimeIsMoney @s a currency. The Cincinnati Time Store, and “labor-hour” currencies (such as MountainHours), all demonstrate that time is a source of value which can viably back currency. This is especially so when we consider the Holographic Universe Theory’s notion that black holes may store information.
That’s why keeping up on your historiological astrological symbolism will help make sure you’ll be In The Mooney®, and stay there.

The monetary policy on which we have set a course is one anchored in a solid foundation of hoodoo microeconomics, voodoo macroeconomics, and Moonie world trade theory. It is a sound, freeing, open-source theory, backed by standardized units of human bread.
As Rosa suggested: no bread, no man, no work. If we do not eat (“eat”, not “work”, nor “spend”), we die. Work is but an opportunistic middleman, for Hannah also said that work is distinct from action and labor. We work to earn money that we would otherwise not have to spend, if we did not “need” all the things that those who work us require of us.
Remember, need is distinct from want. Satisfaction of base needs is necessary to sustain the adequate bodily health needed to support hard work, and no employer ever compensated a new hire to the tune of the value of all the things he had to buy in order to get his shit together well enough to go about applying for a job.
A monetary policy that takes none of this into consideration will rightly suffer from a battery of attacks, and wither and die. This is why our currency must be alive.
That is what is meant by Human Bread. It is the Doe that brings us back to Dough.

You must choose a currency (or a money, or none); I cannot choose it for you. But I recommend that you choose a currency that is current; its circulation must flow freely. Volatility is a quality of water; it is not solely a state of turmoil. That’s what the spend-o-crats at Fox Business won’t tell you (F=6 O=60 X=600). You know sometimes words have two meanings.
So, you see, finance is all about water. What makes up 70% of our bodies? Water. We’re literally made of money! And what controls the tides? The Moon. That’s what I’ve been trying to tell you!
Stay away from currencies that won’t give you the time of day. If your currency doesn’t keep current, you’re gonna have such a bad time that you won’t even know what time it is. But using a living currency helps prevent your choice in currency from going stale.
Read your handprints and follow the Economicon: Worship no dead moneys. Use not currencies of the past; currencies that do not keep current know no lunar calendar, know no compromise.
It then follows that human time – especially time expending effort and work (and especially especially effort and work watching and moonitoring the Moon) – is a source of time-money-Moon-value. It is this theory of (e)valuation which alone may knock the Power Theory of Value off its orbit and into relative retrograde.

Don’t be fooled, Moon Money Israel. Talk of objective and intrinsic value balks - Fairuza balks - saunters into a crevice, and yields at the majesty of the Will of each splendid Unique. Your Jewels are the most precious to you, they cannot be reduced to mere numbers.
The Neoliberals who endorse this foodoo (false hoodoo) would not bear the thorns of haggling in terms of pieces of silver, or communion wafers (or, for that matter, Nilla Wafers, as long as they’re properly ordained). I mean, does Andy Warhol have no say in this whatsoever?
If the Body of Christ could be traded around like that 2,000 years ago, then why can’t today’s money-changers get in on such a fortuitous investment opportunity? Corporate welfare whores, get in on this action. Act now: kill the Church, and scrap it for parts to sell! Go dig your graves, then fill your mouth with all the money you will save!

So, then, what is meant by a truly living currency of Human Manna (i.e., Humana)? Should we suffer anything less than a currency whose value is inversely proportionate to the human suffering which caused it, expressed in easily divisible economic units as quantities of blood, sweat, and tears?
            Do we own ourselves, and our toil? What is the value of a pound of flesh, expressed in GBP? Most importantly, are the medical professionals who conduct our pre-employment piss-tests making money selling our urine, hair, cheek swabs, and other pieces of us that harbor DNA?
            Take solace, for questions are meant to be answered.



Written on August 14th, 2017

Edited on September 14th, 2017,
and January 17th and May 11th, 2018

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